Archive for category Bacon Stories

Hot Dogs and Bacon? Yes!

In an earlier posting we talked about a very tasty bacon wrapped treat: Bacon Wrapped Jumbo Chicken Franks. Now of COURSE you have the option of using other types of hot dogs as mandrels for the bacon… but we highly suggest sticking with bigger wieners if you can. Size DOES matter, ya’ know.

So what can ya’ do with small wieners? Especially the ones made from quality meat like Nathan’s and Hebrew National? Rest assured we have found a baconified use for those, too!

Just last night we feasted on some Nathan’s Hot Dogs prepared in the following manner:

  1. Cooked bacon. As usual.
  2. Allowed bacon to drain on paper towel and cool to room temperature.
  3. Cooked hot dogs while bacon cooled.
  4. Diced a variety of fresh hot peppers while hot dogs cooked.
  5. Opened hot dog buns and laid a strip of bacon on each bun wall.
  6. Placed a line of diced hot peppers where the two strips of bacon meet.
  7. Apply a ‘squiggle’ of mustard (not honey mustard!) over the peppers.
  8. Drop a hot dog on top of all that and tuck all the components into place.

One additional thing we opted to do that some may not want to do: We added an additional ‘squiggle’ of mustard over the hot dog because hot dog buns don’t tend to have enough moisture in them for our taste.

We LOVED these hot dog, bacon and fresh hot pepper creations! You will, too!

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High Prices for Bacon These Days… What Gives?!?

OK, just so everyone knows, the folks responsible for More Bacon Please have NOT become vegetarians. Apparently the lack of recent posts has made SOME idiots, er, people out there believe we gave up eating meat.

Preposterous!

We have not given up eating meat and we CERTAINLY have not given up eating bacon. We just cannot AFFORD to eat as much as we did this time last year. On average, the price of bacon has increased way more than our wallets can stomach — despite the grumblings of our stomachs.

Standard, generic bacon rose from its regular cost of around $2.25 per pack to over $3.00 per pack…. an increase of around 33%. Really? 33% and no one sees a problem with that? Hmmm…. That’s fu#ked up.

Brand name bacon rose from its regular, non-sale cost of around $3.99 per pack to over $7.00 per pack! We really don’t need to do the math for you on THAT abusive pricing, do we? Somebody’s getting rich while us, poor WORKING CLASS folks have to ration our bacon intake. Hmmm…. We find that REALLY fu#ked up.

So… What gives? The price of bacon remained relatively stable during times when gas prices soared out of control and costs of other items jumped up because companies incurred greater fuel and transportation costs. Now, however, over the past few months bacon’s pricing has jumped up quite a bit — and for apparently no reason?

Unacceptable! Completely unacceptable! We DEMAND reasonable bacon pricing!

Better Prices on Bacon... or the Hamster Dies!
You Know You Love Bacon When… Pigs Protest Your Every Meal!

New Way to Keep the Doctor Away

Yep. We finally dragged our bacon-loving selves away from the bacon-filled table long enough to post another article on this site. Actually, we have not had the MONEY to buy bacon recently due to evil, greedy big business types jacking up the prices on all grades of bacon and keeping us from enjoying our favorite snack.

So anyways, in lieu of a tasty bacon story, today we’d like to share a short and to the point bacon joke that we heard recently:

Years ago it was suggested ‘ that an apple a day kept the doctor away ‘ But since all the doctors are now Muslim, I’ve found that a bacon sandwich works best!

Did someone say… BACON SANDWICH?!?!?

Beast of a Bacon Sandwich

We will never grow tired of that picture. Ever. EVER.

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Blakk Frogg’s Fourth of July Photos

Yes, we know the 4th of July happened two weeks… deal with it.

At some point over that weekend the infamous Blakk Frogg decided to put a few things together that represented HIS Fourth of July Celebration and below you will see what that evil bastard came up with… after a full day of pounding beers, eating bacon and buying things to blow up.

Now if that photo doesn’t explain everything RIGHT w/ America, then what does? Granted Blakk Frogg omitted the inclusion of a Maxim Magazine cover, but only because his new edition had not arrived in the mail yet. Ha ha.

Blakk Frogg never bought fireworks legally before. If he had more money available, he’d have bought A WHOLE LOT MORE than he did — in spite of his girlfriend’s protests.

Something about hanging out with friends all day drinking ice cold beers pulled from a sizable “bucket of beer”, grilling a truckload of meat on the grill (most flavored somehow w/ bacon, of course), and then blowing things up LEGALLY really appeals to a Frogg.

Wait… Did you just see the award-winning phrase “bucket of beer” and NOT understand what that meant? Sinners! The whole lot of you! We must educate you, ya’ filthy heathens!

Yes. Yes we like beer. Yes we like bacon. Yes we wish the whole world would just stopping acting like a bunch of bitches and just send us all its beer and bacon.

Is that so WRONG?

Forgot the Beer

No, we didn’t leave beer on the bottom of the shopping cart in the grocery store parking lot. Instead, we forgot to post an image of the BEER supply we lined up while visiting w/ family in Myrtle Beach. OOPS.

Now we must tell you, though, that we had more beer lined up waiting to go in the fridge… but damn… don’t that there fridge full’o'beer look right perty?

Bottles of liquor made an appearance, too. More accurately they made a DISappearance. Ha ha. One of the liquor adventures included sample bottles of Jagermeister and Tequila Rose. The guy at the liquor store, an self-admitted lover of bacon, by the way, suggested we add a shot called Jagged Rose to the stuff we’d lined up on the counter already. Hmmmm…. How could we resist?

How’d it taste? Not too bad… Not too bad at all.

And now for the bacon

You didn’t think we’d post something and not mention bacon, did you? Silly rabbit! Take yourself out back and flog yourself with a gopher corpse!

So anyways, our hosts also love bacon and couldn’t WAIT to show us a new bacon-infused cheese their local deli recently began selling… and what better way to demonstrate the sheer awesomeness of a new cheese than over perfectly cooked, hand-packed burgers, right?

The cheese? Cheddar. The bacon? Applewood smoked. The verdict? Totally tasty! Go out and get some right now if you can!

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KFC Double Down — Bacon Lovers’ Taste Test

First off, let us say that we have not ventured into a Kentucky Fried Chicken food serving facility in YEARS because we found their food priced too high for what we thought it should have cost. Oh, and something they use in their food always made pretty much everyone we know do a “Dine’n'Dash” — not meaning they boned out on the check after the meal, but rather they ate and quickly dashed home to the comfort and solitude of their own private bathrooms.

Many rolls of toilet paper died a horrible fate after some KFC meals… Need we go into more detail than that?

So anyways, we decided to pick up a few of the new KFC Double Down sandwiches to see if the hype matched the allegedly meaty meal’s real nature.

Below you will see a picture of the ‘fried’ version. We wanted the ‘grilled version’, but the guy in front of us walked away with the last one.

KFC Double Down Sandwich

If we had a nickel for each time we went to KFC and had to wait some ridiculous amount of time because they ran out something ‘right before we got there’, we’d have an eighteen wheeler full of nickels… and hence another reason why we gave up on the Colonel a long time ago: No one has given us any nickels for our inconvenience.

Getting back to the KFC Double Down review, though, first let us tell you that each sandwich costs a little more than $5 apiece.

Huh? What? $5 per SANDWICH? Wow.

So after scarfing down one of the fat and calorie bomb Double Downs we all agreed that they tasted good (we ordered ours w/ extra sauce), and also that none of us could figure out exactly what part of the sandwich gave it such a salty taste.

For anyone looking to fill up on just a sandwich, don’t bank on it if you have a hearty appetite. An average person could probably manage two of the sandwiches as a meal without too much difficulty.

As for the bacon, well, the KFC Double Down did, indeed, have two strips of bacon. Not much more we can say about the bacon other than the KFC Double Down would have lacked character without it.

Then again, we say that about ANYthing that has bacon on or in it…

One final note: We liked the fact that they threw pepper jack cheese into the mix instead of some generic, bland processed cheddar crap.

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Big Bacon… Little Pan!

A while back David Spade and Chris Farley (RIP) starred in a comedy called Black Sheep and at one point in the movie Chris put on David’s suit jacket or blazer –which CLEARLY did NOT fit him — and pranced around the room chanting, “Big man, little coat… Big man, little coat” and then the coat ripped. Ha ha. Too funny. Guess you had to have seen the movie, though.

At any rate, we got some black pepper bacon from the store the other day and noticed that each strip had either taken Viagra or the butcher shop cut them extra large and long. Either way, we just HAD to try fitting as much of our meat in the… pan as possible.

Don’t sit there and act like you wouldn’t do the same thing, dang it! ‘Cuz you know you would try to fit as much of your meat in as you could!

Big Bacon, Little Pan! Big Bacon, Little Pan!
Big Bacon, Little Pan! Big Bacon, Little Pan!

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Bacon Wrapped Chicken Tenderloins

Do we ever get tired of bacon and chicken? Never! To even ASK such thing equals bacon blasphemy and we don’t STAND for that kind of talk ’round these parts!

“All praise be to bacon. You are salty. You are meaty. We love you, Bacon! Amen.”

Getting back to the point of this blog entry, we snagged some chicken tenderloins on sale at the local grocery store and instantly knew what to do with them: Wrap Them in Bacon.

Bacon Wrapped Chicken Tenderloins
Bacon Wrapped Chicken Tenderloins

Please note that we do NOT normally splurge on chicken tenderloins. Ordinarily we find the pricing of that food item as ridiculous and absurd as gasoline prices a few years ago. The idea of spending $4.99 per pound (or more) for little strips of chicken offends us because money wasted on overpriced chicken could have gotten used to buy an extra pack of Center Cut Bacon, more beer, or BOTH.

Right before we shoved these puppies under the broiler we had the idea of battering them up and deep frying them… but that idea went nowhere. We don’t own a deep fryer and the idea of all that hot grease landing on one of us ‘cuz we drunkenly bumped into while trying to explain why goats and sheep sound so much alike did not sound all that entertaining.

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Bacon Garnished Shrimp

On this particular evening we found ourselves mildly buzzed from a day of drinking copious amounts of tequila colored lightly w/ margarita mix… and in possession of shrimp and bacon. What to do, what to do…

Then the idea struck us: Get out a big knife and drunkenly cut up some bacon into garnish-like strips and wrap each shrimp! BRILLIANT!

Bacon Garnished Shrimp
Bacon Garnished Shrimp — On the Burner?!? Ha ha!

Needless to say, the combination of ‘large knife, greasy bacon and drunken fingers’ entertained us for quite a while. No one went to the hospital, surprisingly, and not one piece of bacon OR shrimp fell on the floor during the preparation process.

Pretty much all of US, though, DID fall on the floor at some point after we enjoyed our lovely little bacony seafood morsels.

Tequila… it reminds you that gravity works, and works WELL.

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I’ve Died and Gone to… Bacon?

Some days a guy can really luck out, ya’ know? Take the other day, for example. After a long 10-hour day of slaving away at the office and then fighting traffic on my way home for an hour and a half I dropped all my sh#t in the front hallway of my home, marched directly towards the kitchen to get a beer and saw… this… along the way.

A Bounty of Bacon
A Beautiful Bounty of Bacon

Apparently my girlfriend went shopping earlier and got us some presents. I love Christmas! Wait… Didn’t we celebrate that a month or so ago? I don’t care! I see bacon!

They need to create a bacon-centric Holiday so that we bacon lovers can rejoice and share the gift of bacon with our fellow bacon believers. I don’t think I’ll live to SEE the day when a standard issue office calendar has Bacon Day listed as an official government Holiday or ever have a chance to walk through a Hallmark Store and browse through Bacon Day greeting cards, but perhaps my children will.

Getting back to the bacon on the table though, wow! A beautiful bounty of bacon… and things get better! Not only did she purchase a perfect pile of pork products, she already had some laid in a frying pan ready to cook! She also had a cold beer for me in her hand!

Man oh man. A cold beer and all that beautiful bacon. Talk about awesome, right? Totally awesome. Love at first sight.

Oh, and as for the girlfriend, I think I’ll keep her around a little while longer.

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